Mismatched Drinking Habits In A Relationship Don’t Have To Be A Dealbreaker, Experts Say
By Isabella Wilson
No matter how different you and your partner's drinking habits are, there has to be respect and understanding from both sides. People drink, don't drink, drink a lot, or drink very little, for so many different reasons.
"There may be important underlying causes for different beliefs and behaviors about alcohol consumption," Beth Irias, a licensed marriage and family therapist who specializes in addiction, and the president and founder of Clearly Clinical, tells Bustle.
As Irias explains, if one partner grew up in a home where alcohol use disorder was a problem for one or both parents, "it may be frightening for a partner to drink to the point of a visible buzz."
Pirbhai echoes a similar sentiment, in regards to the difference in alcohol consumption.
"I believe that the reason couples have differing drinking habits can also play a role in how they cope," Pirbhai says. "If one partner drinks less because of health or family history reasons, it can potentially cause strain if the other partner drinks heavily or even more than the other."
The behaviors we have today and the people we are today have everything to do with the past that formed us. Whether that past was early childhood or even something that happened just six months ago, we are affected. Understanding the why and how of your partner's behavior can, as Pirbhai tells Bustle, "avoid any misunderstandings or future resentments."
And if one partner wants to get sober, for whatever reason, then that's another aspect that's important to understand.
“Sit with your partner to try to understand why he or she wants to get sober,” Gottlieb says. “There is a saying, ‘those amongst us no explanation is necessary, those not amongst us no explanation is possible.’ That being said, I believe it is still very important to try to gain the best understanding you can, in order to help your partner along their journey.”
Despite what our culture tends to make us believe, not everyone likes to drink and not everyone is affected the same way by alcohol.
