How to stop being an over-thinker

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10 Simple Ways You Can Stop Yourself From Overthinking

Here are 10 simple ideas to help overthinkers stop spinning their wheels.

Overthinking doesn’t sound so bad on the surface–thinking is good, right?

When you overthink, your judgments get cloudy and your stress gets elevated. You spend too much time in the negative. It can become difficult to act.

If this feels like familiar territory to you, here are 10 simple ideas to free yourself from overthinking.

1. Awareness is the beginning of change.

Before you can begin to address or cope with your habit of overthinking, you need to learn to be aware of it when it’s happening. Any time you find yourself doubting or feeling stressed or anxious, step back and look at the situation and how you’re responding. In that moment of awareness is the seed of the change you want to make.

2. Don’t think of what can go wrong, but what can go right.

In many cases, overthinking is caused by a single emotion: fear. When you focus on all the negative things that might happen, it’s easy to become paralyzed. Next time you sense that you starting to spiral in that direction, stop. Visualize all the things that can go right and keep those thoughts present and up front.

3. Distract yourself into happiness.

Sometimes it’s helpful to have a way to distract yourself with happy, positive, healthy alternatives. Things like mediation, dancing, exercise, learning an instrument, knitting, drawing, and painting can distance you from the issues enough to shut down the overanalysis.

4. Put things into perspective.

It’s always easy to make things bigger and more negative than they need to be. The next time you catch yourself making a mountain out of a molehill, ask yourself how much it will matter in five years. Or, for that matter, next month. Just this simple question, changing up the time frame, can help shut down overthinking.

5. Stop waiting for perfection.

This is a big one. For all of us who are waiting for perfection, we can stop waiting right now. Being ambitious is great but aiming for perfection is unrealistic, impractical, and debilitating. The moment you start thinking “This needs to be perfect” is the moment you need to remind yourself, “Waiting for perfect is never as smart as making progress.”

6. Change your view of fear.

Whether you’re afraid because you’ve failed in the past, or you’re fearful of trying or overgeneralizing some other failure, remember that just because things did not work out before does not mean that has to be the outcome every time. Remember, every opportunity is a new beginning, a place to start again.

7. Put a timer to work.

Give yourself a boundary. Set a timer for five minutes and give yourself that time to think, worry, and analyze. Once the timer goes off, spend 10 minutes with a pen and paper, writing down all the things that are worrying you, stressing you, or giving you anxiety. Let it rip. When the 10 minutes is up, throw the paper out and move on–preferably to something fun.

8. Realize you can’t predict the future.

No one can predict the future; all we have is now. If you spend the present moment worrying about the future, you are robbing yourself of your time now. Spending time on the future is simply not productive. Spend that time instead on things that give you joy.

9. Accept your best.

The fear that grounds overthinking is often based in feeling that you aren’t good enough–not smart enough or hardworking enough or dedicated enough. Once you’ve given an effort your best, accept it as such and know that, while success may depend in part on some things you can’t control, you’ve done what you could do.

10. Be grateful.

You can’t have a regretful thought and a grateful thought at the same time, so why not spend the time positively? Every morning and every evening, make a list of what you are grateful for. Get a gratitude buddy and exchange lists so you have a witness to the good things that are around you.

Overthinking is something that can happen to anyone. But if you have a great system for dealing with it you can at least ward off some of the negative, anxious, stressful thinking and turn it into something useful, productive, and effective.

I have to admit, I am an over-thinker. I can take a perfectly normal circumstance and analize, critique, and dissect it into all its parts until it no longer makes any sense whatsoever. And I know I am not the only one who suffers from this type of thinking.

Maybe anxiety has something to do with it. Maybe fear. All of the what-ifs vying for attention every few seconds. It can be exhausting. But more than that, it can be damaging to you and the one you are in a relationship with.

If you are an over-thinker, or have been in a relationship with an over-thinker, you know what I am talking about.

From my personal experience, the fastest way to damage a relationship, or your own well-being, is to over-think everything. And I’ll tell you why.

First of all, you need to understand what happens to the mind when you start to enter that “over-thinking mode”.
You see something, or you hear something that makes you form a question in your head. Or you go back to something that was said or done in the past, and you focus on that. Suddenly, you are entering the over-thinking zone, and you are ill-prepared. (Over-thinking will catch you off guard most times.) The mind works in curious ways. It will divert all attention to things you would rather ignore and force you to deal with something until a resolution is reached- or until you pass out and remember it in the morning.

You will catch yourself saying things like, “that doesn’t make sense,” or “I wouldn’t have done that,” or even ” what does that mean?” Then comes the barrage of thoughts that hinder you from being happy.
When you look at something under a microscope, you only see the detail that makes up the entirety- you don’t actually see the big picture. It’s the same with over-thinking.

You only see the things that are a small part of something much bigger. When you mention the little things that trigger your over-thinking response, when you ask 100 questions in regards to why your partner went out for pizza instead of going for the usual burger joint with their friends, when you ask why it took 35 minutes to respond to your text instead of the usual immediate response- you are focusing on the trivial instead of the important.

What’s important is that your partner told you they went for pizza, and they did respond to your text. It’s the “why’s” that get us caught up in our own thoughts. The “why’s” are what cause a hindrance in our relationships and in our own progression, individually.

The other side of this is over-thinking about what “you may be doing wrong.”

Trust me, if you are worried that you might be doing something wrong, you are probably doing everything right except worrying about what you are doing wrong. Over-thinking leads to blame- one way or the other, you or them. Stop the blame cycle!

Breathe and learn to trust. Trust yourself and others. It really is the only way to move forward in your life. If you are thinking this is easier said than done, you’re right. But let’s be realistic… it’s usually easier to say something than to do it. To stop the damage being done to your relationship, you must stop the over-thinking.

How to stop over-thinking?

Well, there is no answer that will work for everyone; I can only tell you what worked for me.

Acceptance and letting go. Whatever happens in life is going to happen whether you think about it till your brain explodes, or not. Accept what life brings your way, and let go of the need to have all the answers.

Repeat after me: “I’m okay. He’s/she’s okay. We’re okay.”

Those words have helped me more times than I can remember. 99% of the time, when you are over-thinking something, you create a problem that wasn’t there. And 99% of the time, you ARE okay, he/she IS okay, and you guys ARE OKAY. Seriously, use these words. Say them to yourself as many times as you need. Words are powerful and they can help you if you use them properly.

So, remember to breathe. Stop the blame. Accept and let go. “I’m okay.”
These reminders will help you to curb your over-thinking and put an end to the damage being caused by it.

4. Schedule a time for it, and stick to it.

Posted Feb 12, 2016

Whether they beat themselves up over a mistake they made yesterday or fret about how they’re going to succeed tomorrow, overthinkers are plagued by distressing thoughts—and their inability to get out of their own heads leaves them in a state of constant anguish.

While everyone overthinks things once in a while, some people just can’t ever seem to quiet the constant barrage of thoughts. Their inner monologue includes two destructive thought patterns—ruminating and worrying.

Ruminating involves rehashing the past:

• I shouldn’t have spoken up in the meeting today. Everyone looked at me like I was an idiot.
• I could have stuck it out at my old job. I would be happier if I would have just stayed there.
• My parents always said I wouldn’t amount to anything. And they were right.

Worrying involves negative—often catastrophic—predictions about the future:

• I’m going to embarrass myself tomorrow when I give that presentation. My hands will shake, my face will turn red, and everyone will see that I’m incompetent.
• I’ll never get promoted. It doesn’t matter what I do. It’s not going to happen.
• My spouse is going to find someone better than I am. I’m going to end up divorced and alone.

Overthinkers don’t just use words to contemplate their lives. Sometimes, they conjure up images. too. They may envision their car going off the road or replay a distressing event in their minds like a movie. Either way, their tendency to overthink everything holds them back from doing something productive.

The Dangers Of Overthinking

Thinking too much about things isn’t just a nuisance; it can take a serious toll on your well-being. Research finds that dwelling on your shortcomings, mistakes, and problems increases your risk of mental-health problems. And as your mental health declines, your tendency to ruminate increases, leading to a vicious cycle that is hard to break.

Studies also show that overthinking leads to serious emotional distress. To escape that distress, many overthinkers resort to unhealthy coping strategies, such as alcohol or food.

If you’re an overthinker, you likely already know you can’t sleep when your mind won’t shut off. Studies confirm this, finding that rumination and worry lead to fewer hours of sleep and poorer sleep quality.

How To Stop Overthinking

Putting an end to rehashing, second-guessing, and catastrophic predictions is easier said than done. But with consistent practice, you can limit your negative thinking patterns:

1. Notice When You’re Thinking Too Much

Awareness is the first step in putting an end to overthinking. Start paying attention to the way you think. When you notice yourself replaying events in your mind over and over, or worrying about things you can’t control, acknowledge that your thoughts aren’t productive.

2. Challenge Your Thoughts

It’s easy to get carried away with negative thoughts. Before you conclude that calling in sick is going to get you fired, or that forgetting one deadline is going to cause you to become homeless, acknowledge that your thoughts may be exaggeratedly negative. Learn to recognize and replace thinking errors before they work you into a complete frenzy.

3. Keep The Focus On Active Problem-Solving

Dwelling on your problems isn’t helpful, but looking for solutions is. Ask yourself what steps you can take to learn from a mistake or avoid a future problem. Instead of asking why something happened, ask yourself what you can do about it.

4. Schedule Time For Reflection

Stewing on problems for long periods of time isn’t productive, but brief reflection can be helpful. Thinking about how you could do things differently or recognizing potential pitfalls to a plan, for example, can help you do better in the future. Incorporate 20 minutes of “thinking time” into your daily schedule. During this time, let yourself worry, ruminate, or mull over whatever you want. Then, when the time is up, move onto something more productive. When you notice yourself overthinking things outside of your scheduled time, remind yourself that you’ll think about it later.

5. Practice Mindfulness

It’s impossible to rehash yesterday or worry about tomorrow when you’re living in the present. Commit to becoming more aware of the here and now. Mindfulness takes practice, like any other skill, but over time, it can decrease overthinking.

6. Change The Channel

Telling yourself to stop thinking about something can backfire. The more you try to avoid the thought from entering your brain, the more likely it is to keep popping up. Busying yourself with an activity is the best way to change the channel. Exercise, engage in conversation on a completely different subject or get working on a project that will distract your mind from a barrage of negative thoughts.

LinkedIn Image Credit: F8 studio/Shutterstock

Do you find yourself obsessing and overanalyzing everything? Do you feel fatigued or anxious during those times? Overthinking has become a world epidemic that leads to severe depression and anxiety disorders. Through extensive research, psychology professor Susan Nolen-Hoeksema of the University of Michigan found that overthinking is prevalent in young and middle aged adults, with 73% of 25-35 year-olds identified as overthinkers. There are also more women (57%) than men (43%) as overthinkers.

Here are 5 signs that you are an overthinker:

1. Do you have trouble detaching from your thoughts before going to sleep?

Overthinkers cannot separate from the obsession of worrying. Insomnia is very common. You spend the night over analyzing the issue without getting to a solution. The thoughts replay themselves over and over until you feel paralyzed. Because you don’t rest, you are prominent to depression.

A healthy suggestion is to write your thoughts down before retiring. Keep a journal with your feeling and allow that to also be a way to release the nervous energy. Creating, painting or doing a hobby in the evening allows for the mind to detach from the thoughts while keeping your emotional body focused on something positive.

2. Do you live in fear of what might happen?

The overthinker feels paralyzed with anxiety worrying about the “what if’s” instead of living in the moment. In the research Nolen-Hoeksema found that this is the reason overthinkers are more likely to turn to alcohol and drugs in order to drown the constant worrying.

A good advice in dealing with those future fears is to give yourself a time everyday to overthink. If you are going to overthink give yourself permission to have an appointment with the thoughts. Use 15 minutest and time the session. During that time you can document the thoughts or speak out loud to yourself. Creating a habit and ritual will eventually break the other habits of overthinking all day long. It’s replacing one negative reinforcement with a positive action.

3. Do you constantly over analyze?

Overthinkers are quite exhausted and stricken by anxiety. Depression is always hanging over them. The overthinking mind feels out of control. They cannot grasp any solution. Dr. Pene Schmidt from the University of Melbourne’s School of Behaviour Science, suggests, “Remember, while we may not be able to control different situations in our lives, we can control the way we respond to them.”

She also suggests that when the mind starts to create negative thoughts to ask yourself, “What are the effects of these thoughts? Is there a solution that can be reached right now?”

When you find yourself over analyzing try to take deep breaths. Close your eyes and meditate for a few minutes. Think of a special place that you love and brings you joy. Stop projecting yourself in the future. You cannot manage what has not happened.

4. Are you a perfectionist and take things personally?

Do you worry about failing? The overthinker usually has a low self-esteem full of doubts. The mind goes on overdrive thinking about how others will view you. Realize that no one is perfect. The imperfection is magnified in giving up without even trying to accomplish whatever is swirling in the mind. Striving for perfection is always a recipe for disaster. Take baby steps. See the big picture and shift those emotions from: “I can’t do this because I will be ridiculed” to “I am incredibly brave for doing this.”

5. Do you second guess yourself?

Overthinkers are indecisive and tend to live with many regrets. Overthinking is not a genetic disposition. It is a learned behavior. Therefore, when the mind starts to go to a place of unstructured thoughts it is because of past experiences. The overthinker believes that they will repeat the same mistake over and over through different scenarios. Panic then dictates every possible decision.

Avoid situations that can lead to the stressors of overthinking. You can determine what causes you to stress over a particular decision. If you did something one way in the past then try doing it another way now. Work on goals and map out how you will get there without second guessing every move. Do your research. Researching dissipates the fear of the unknown.

Forming positive thoughts and actions diminishes the fears of stress. In order to stop the overthinking mind, keep yourself busy with positive reinforcements: exercise, creating, sharing, being outdoors, and reaching out to friends and family. Having a support system helps eliminate the negative thought pattern.

“We are dying from overthinking. We are slowly killing ourselves by thinking about everything. Think. Think. Think. You can never trust the human mind anyway. It’s a death trap.”

“The sharpest minds often ruin their lives by overthinking the next step, while the dull win the race with eyes closed,” wrote Bethany Brookbank.

Overthinking sounds like a simple problem.

Unfortunately, if you give it a second look, you will see it is anything but. Our world is just not made for over-thinkers. It is made for not-so-thoughtful doers.

An overactive mind can easily miss the best opportunities. The result is anxiety, and an overwhelming feeling of self-doubt. Being a chronic overthinker is difficult. Loving one can be even more so.

Here are 16 things you should know if your loved one is an over-thinker:

1. Telling your partner to stop overthinking is as useless as telling them to stop breathing.

If anything, doing this will only lead to more overthinking about overthinking. This meta overthinking is like a vicious circle. A way out is to suggest your partner that they should stop making a mountain out of a molehill.

2. Word choice is important to an over-thinker.

When you are having a world with him or her, try to make yourself as clear as possible, or else you risk exacerbating the problem. Honesty and transparency are appreciated.

3. Your actions must be consistent with your words, values, and identity.

Otherwise, all three will be doubted. Your over-thinker needs to be sure of who you are. That said, you should be careful if you ever decide to play even the most innocent joke on him or her. The consequences may be hard to predict.

4. Project confidence in your relationship.

Your partner will pick up on this and feel safer and more secure. This can help to alleviate their racing thoughts and keep them in the moment. Stop overthinking your relationship. Enjoy the nice time you are having together instead of worrying about what may happen in the future.

5. Over-thinking can often lead to pessimism.

Your partner will appreciate someone who shows them the bright side of life. From time to time you’ve got to remind them of that the grass isn’t always greener on the other side of the fence.

6. Commitment may come more slowly with an over-thinker.

Give them time and space to come around. Rushing them will only cause more doubt and anxiety. You may also need to reassure them of your feelings every now and then. Even if you two get on like a house on fire, your overthinking partner may still get possessed by doubts about the future.

7. Encourage your partner to do their over-thinking out loud.

Offer to act as a non-judgmental sounding board. Verbalizing a worry can help their brain cope with it more effectively. This exercise also increases trust and understanding.

8. An over-thinker will always notice and appreciate the good things that you do for them.

They are unlikely to take your good deeds for granted. In fact, they might appreciate your efforts like nobody else ever has. That’s one of the nicest things about being in a relationship with such a person.

9. An over-thinker is easily overwhelmed.

Give your partner time and space to process the information they are bombarded with every day. Otherwise they may just block off and withdraw into themselves.

10. It can be difficult to get an over-thinker out of their own head.

I mean, most of the time they are preoccupied with their own thoughts and feelings. If you manage to do it, however, you can rest assured that you’ve really made a difference in their life.

11. Spontaneity may seem romantic, but it isn’t a good idea if you are in a relationship with an overthinker.

So as to feel confident and at ease in a particular situation, they need to have planned it well in advance.

12. Try not to become irritated if your over-thinker needs constant reassurance.

It means they are happy with you and they are afraid lest they may lose you. That said, you may gently try to boost their self confidence.

13. Details are important to an over-thinker.

They need to know as much background information as possible so as to clearly see the bigger picture. At the beginning It may seem tedious, but in the long run it will pay off for you both.

14. They have no more control over the way their brain processes information than you have over your ability to see colors or hear musical tones.

It’s a part of them. To put it more simply, they just can’t help overthinking stuff.

15. An over-thinker will ask more questions than most.

It can be easy to take these as accusations. Don’t worry – they’re not. Over-thinkers just need more information than others do to feel secure. Because of their natural attention to the detail and highly-developed analytical skills, they usually make good detectives or forensic scientists.

16. Their mind is sometimes playing tricks on them.

They don’t need you to do the same.

“Overthinking, also, best known as creating problems that are never there,” wrote David Sikhosana.

Unfortunately, these problems are very real to your partner. Even if your partner is aware of the fact that they are over-thinking, this does nothing to slow their thoughts and lessen their anxiety.

Your patience, consistency, and trust, however, can do wonders to improve their emotional balance.

If you love an overthinker, then there are a few things you need to know in order to weather the difficulties.

I never thought about it before. Actually, I did, I thought about it several times over, come to think of it, because I’m an overthinker-I just forgot.There’s so much in my brain, so much that

There is so much in my brain, so much that it’s difficult to keep my priorities straight and keep focused. And there’s my loved ones, those who promised to love and care for me indefinitely-my over-thinking drives them nuts.

Here’s what I want them to know

But this doesn’t mean I shouldn’t be loved, it just means I have a different outlook on life. I want them to understand, and I want to meet them in the middle with compromise. I just need them to know a few things so they will have patience with me. Furthermore, I want to build a bridge from my reality to the one where my loved ones reside.

Overthinkers have a Constant flow of doubts

They are the ones who might ask you if you love them, over and over. They may ask if you are mad or tired of them, but this is common. When thoughts run rampant, especially in the highly intelligent individual’s mind, these doubts can take control easily.

Thoughts form words, even redundant words, and phrases, and they must be heard. There is an urgency for the overthinker to be heard because, inside their minds, they are constantly questioning their worth. The smarter they are, the more intricate and detailed the thoughts will be.

They are great listeners

Not everything about an over thinker is negative. Because of the constant flow of ideas and thoughts, an over thinker is a thorough thinker. There is very little that passes unnoticed in their mind, and if you have problems, talking with them may just be the best solution.

They will analyze, break down and calculate every little detail of the complicated situation at hand. It’s not just good for you to talk with an over thinker, either. It is healthy for them to use their character to approach and conquer a challenge.

Socializing is difficult

It’s totally different when socializing with an overthinker because many of them also suffer from social anxiety. The atmosphere in public is intimidating, especially when it’s a large group of people involved and this further complicates the thinking process. They don’t usually like small talk or answering a lot of questions about themselves either.

The preferred social atmosphere is one that doesn’t seem like a stressful situation. When the pressure is lifted, the overthinker can feel comfortable. Movies, especially comedies, are great options for going out, as it requires little conversation and a light atmosphere to make them feel at home.

They are not controlling

Now this will seem confusing at times, but the over thinker is not controlling like they seem to be. Although they strive to keep things in order, primarily by always having a backup plan or similar safety nets, they aren’t trying to rule the lives of others.

It’s best to play along with these ideas or plans in order to show them that you care. There is a limit, however, and maybe with a little help, you can show them that they don’t have to be “in control” of every little aspect of their lives. Getting to the point: Overthinkers aren’t the biggest fans of spontaneity.

Make yourself clear

Overthinkers tend to read things into vague conversations. If your objective is to get a point across, you absolutely have to be clear about what you are saying. Any little discrepancy can make the over thinker paranoid and untrusting. This is when they tend to fill in the blanks with what they think you mean.

If you have known an over thinker for a long time, you are already familiar with how this works. The best option, as you may have learned by trial and error, is to provide details and stress your meaning until the over thinker knows exactly what you are trying to say.

Being an overthinker is not bad, it’s just different. This is why loved ones have to understand how to deal with them. I’m an overthinker, and I have experienced all these things before.

If it wasn’t for my family striving to understand me, I don’t know where I would be today. With their help, I have learned to process my thoughts much better and enjoy the simpler things in life.

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This Post Has 4 Comments

Thanks, I really felt like u r talking exactly about me and that’s awesome I thought that no one understands me or think the same as I do but that’s hopeful 🙂

Being an overthinker is probably one of the hardest things to endure. I live it every single day, and I notice everything. Little inconsistencies, problems that could possibly happen and all their tangents….yeah, that’s life for me too.

Not always great, but it has it’s good points. 🙂

Really my mind got refereshed, thanks a lot and it’s a wonderful life improvement It’s exactly what my problem is.

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Frequently, my clients talk to me about how they overthink many problems or over-analyze a situation. People do this because they engage in something that I call “preemptive coping.”

A good example is playing chess and trying to figure out all the possible moves before picking up a chess piece. Or looking at a situation and saying, “okay, if this person makes this move, then I’ll do this. If this person makes this move, then I’ll do that.” People do this in order to preemptively cope with all possible outcomes.

The problem is that they’re doing that in order to cope with the outcomes. And by doing that, they backhandedly diminish their belief in their own problem-solving ability. Plus, it’s mentally exhausting. Anyone who overthinks or over-analyzes can relate to the fact that it is mentally exhausting.

The other problem with it is if you’re playing this chess game of all the possible outcomes that could happen, many times, none of the situations actually occur. You could be thinking, “okay, these 10 things could happen, and if these 10 things happen, I will have these 10 responses to these 10 things.” You have all these possible outcomes and none of them happen.

It’s a perpetual cycle of overthinking or over-analyzing. It is common to over-analyze what another person might have said or what another person might have done. People tend to make a lot of assumptions based on what people are thinking or what people are saying without a lot of evidence that they’re going to do anything. Then based on these assumptions, people are left guessing about what that person is thinking or what that person’s next behavior is going to be.

That’s when the overthinking and overanalyzing comes in. “Okay, I think this person is thinking this, I think this person is going to do this based on X.” Without evidence. “And because I think they’re going to do this, I’m going to do X, Y or Z in return.” Many times none of that ever happens, and people usually waste a lot of precious mental energy on this task and then they’re on to the next.

The next day, something else happens, they make more assumptions about something else that someone said or did and they repeat the same behavior. “Okay, I think that they may be thinking this, or that what they just did meant that. And they are about to say or do X to me, then I’m going to do X, Y, or Z in return.” Oftentimes none of these eventualities ever occur. All this guessing diminishes a strong belief in your problem-solving ability and your coping ability.

It’s critically important that people have a belief in their ability to cope with different situations. This speaks to their need to be able to have patience and frustration tolerance to wait for an event to occur. It’s really hard to have patience, it’s really hard to have frustration tolerance. The more you can cope and wait for something to actually happen, the more satisfied you’ll be with your life. People spend too much time acting on assumptions instead of acting on actual events, which causes them to be really dissatisfied.

If you can learn to live and cope with the unknown, have the ability to tolerate with patience and frustration tolerance with the unknown, and only cope with things as they happen, you will feel more satisfied. You will believe in your ability to cope with things that actually happen. This will help reduce overthinking and over-analyzing and following a path that will only lead to further mental exhaustion.

A Path to Sustainable Life Satisfaction

I invite you to view my new YouTube, “A Path To Sustainable Life Satisfaction Special” which features all six of my empowering techniques and web series episodes I created to help people master and achieve sustainable satisfaction in their lives.

Dating an Overthinker? Here Are 8 Things That Will Always Happen in Your Relationship

Relationships are never meant to be perfect. They are messy, full of emotions, but are always filled with love. When you date someone, you involve yourselves in each others’ lives completely. While everybody is different, sometimes your partner turns out to be an overthinker. Overthinking may sound like a simple problem, although it is anything but that. Overthinkers may be the worst choice for a date, but that doesn’t make them terrible people. But a relationship with them is full of fireworks. While being a person who overthinks everything is difficult, loving one is even harder.

Asking them not to overthink is useless, they’ll do it anyway.

Overthinking is an emotional state, and emotions cannot be steered whenever one deems it fit. So, telling an over thinker to not overthink is useless. Dictating them how to react to a situation may just trigger them more. If anything, doing this will only lead them to overthink things even more.

You are constantly reassuring them.

Over thinkers find it really hard to get comfortable with a situation until and unless someone doesn’t walk them through it. It’s like being with a child, you just can’t get rid of them. You just keep on repeating a lullaby to constantly assure them. So if you are in a meeting and won’t be reachable for a while, you have to make sure they know you are not dead, because they will end up thinking otherwise.

Lying just becomes second nature.

When you are with an overthinker, you ultimately become a master of lies, because you know telling the truth will not do any good. It may not a good thing, but you just can’t help it, and eventually, it becomes a second nature. Overthinkers just find it really hard to believe a fact even if they are served with the truth.

Trust sometimes just doesn’t exist between you two.

Generally, trust is a concrete foundation that forms a relationship. But with over-thinkers, it is an other-worldly thing. Rationally, they know they can trust you, but their emotions don’t allow them to do so. Their brain has only two options, either its A or the apocalypse, there is no in between.

Emotions are always overflowing.

Overthinkers are a storage centre of emotions. It’s like wildfire, killing everything that comes in its course. Overthinkers are the worst at emotions. At one point they will become cold as ice, the other second they can kill you with their tears. You just don’t know what will happen the next moment.

Patience is nonexistent.

Patience is the key to peace, but with overthinkers it is nonexistent. They know that their partners might be stuck or busy, but they will always choose the most terrible option, and stress over it. They have the compulsive desire to control everything because waiting just too mainstream for them.

Sharing everything is important.

Overthinkers want to know every detail, they find solace in it. This is their way to reassure themselves that everything is going right and is under control.

Apologies seem to have no limit.

They know that sometimes they over-assess a situation and react dramatically, so when you are dating them, expect a hoard of apologies every day.

So, the next time you’re wondering what is wrong with your relationshipr, gentle piece of advice, don’t date them if you can’t handle the work. With overthinkers, all you need to do is listen and promise them you’re there. That’s it. They might be difficult to deal with at times, but with love and care it can turn out to be great. It’s just a relationship that requires a little more effort. In the end, it’s still going to be amazing, lovely, and fulfilling!

Have you been often criticized for being too meticulous? Do you take your sweet time getting anything done? Have you ever made an impulsive decision and been happy with the adventurous consequences of it, even if it wasn’t necessarily good? Well, if your answer to all the above is in the negative, then chances are, you are an over-thinker.

If you already know about it, then good. You can start improving your compulsive thoughts . But if you are still thinking about it, stop. Here are five classic signs of an over-thinker!

1. You Can’t Sleep Even When You Try Your Hardest

The answer to this problem is right in the clue. You can’t sleep even when you try your hardest. You’re not supposed to be working to sleep. You keep on thinking and worrying about sleeping so much that you end up an insomniac. Sleep is supposed to put your mind to rest, not work it. So, try changing your routine. Use yoga or gentle stretching to release any tension in the mind before sleeping, or relax physically and mentally through meditations. Clean your room. Take a warm bath before bed. Wear warm and comfortable garments. These are the small things that will be of immense help.

2. Anything Can Cause Anxiety

If you are an over-thinker, you are most probably ridden with anxiety too. It can get very hard to make even simple decisions when you feel like any small thing you do will land you in a disaster. And that’s what anxiety makes you feel. It not only has mental implications, but anxiety also takes a physical toll on you. Your breathing will be shallow and your joints will feel stiff. You will be constantly tired because of these fast running trains of thoughts in your head.

It is imperative for you to realize that life is busy outside, and anxiety is real. But remember that you are already in charge of the inside.

3. You Live In The Past

You keep playing all the instances from the past in your head, where you could have done something different. Well, what’s gone is gone. What’s done is done! There is no way you can change the past. What you can change is the future. And for that, you need to work on changing your present.

You are incredibly intelligent, no matter what your over-thinker self tells you. Learn, and let go.

4. Your Present Passes By You

Since you can’t let go of the past, you don’t live in your present. You are constantly overthinking and doubting all your decisions, past and present. This is why you can’t seem to be happy in the present.

All of these signs are interconnected to each other. In fact, they depend on each other to survive. Tackle one, and slowly all the other signs will fade away.

5. You Think People Are Constantly Judging You

You walk past a couple of people on the road and they chuckle right as you cross. What do you think? It’s natural for everyone to feel self-conscious about it. But if you are an over-thinker, you will keep thinking of that moment later, while you try to sleep or even well into the next day.

You need to break this spiral immediately . So what if they were laughing at you? It doesn’t affect them. They are not losing their sleep over it. So why should you? Love yourself, and live life. Don’t lock yourself in the cage of overthinking. We all do it sometimes, but we need to know when it doesn’t help us grow or live life fully.

You are on a path of your own, and only you can help yourself. Your best self won’t come out until you dissolve your over-thinker self. Recognize your issues, reflect on them, and change will follow.